random thoughts


I am getting back to feeling very cranky and energyless in the mornings.

I do not know why this is happening, whether it has got something to do with the chilly or gray weather.

I was feeling better in the summer and following my family visit. Now, in the last few days getting up has been a difficult thing for me, something that I do not enjoy; the thoughts that go through my mind this morning was “how boring it is; now I will do the same things again; use the bathroom, put on the clothes, put on the makeup, go down, contemplate about walking, taking the bus or the cab, feel bad about the idea of walking or waiting at the bus stop even though after these I will feel quite good about myself, or take the cab and feel pampered but will lack the feeling of accomplishment coming from walking or taking the bus..”.

I cannot be excited or joyful in the mornings. I feel late to the office should I take the bus or walk, only because I cannot get up early in the morning. I am tired of this mental judo every morning.

Where am I going like this?

This feeling I have in the mornings is not fun.

I am fed up doing the same things and then get bored.

I am in need of changing a number of things, including my morning routine.

I am planing to change the organization of the furniture in the bedroom to get some kind of change – let’s see whether it will be helpful.

I may want to invest in a radio in my bedroom to listen to it in the morning – maybe it will lift my mood.

I know affirmations or taking some time at home prior to going to the office may change my mood, but I really cannot see myself doing this. Unless I get up early.

And I know if I go to bed early, I can get up early, too and I may feel less pressurized to arrive to the office as early as possible.

I do not know what will work better.

But I know I am fed up of this feeling.

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