One of these days where I have some friction with my old friends over someone we know and differ in opinion.
The person of interest is a previous mentor of us; I have known her for decades and even though she was difficult, I have great respect for her and still keep in touch. This person now is retiring and this is where we got the friction: I welcomed the news and got excited for my previous mentor and decided to do something in her recognition, to be revealed during her retirement party in the coming weeks. My friend, whom I love dearly, seemed to disagree with me and another friend of mine, who feels the same way as I am, fell in between our conversation full of disagreement. We had disagreements, but eventually, everybody respects everybody’s opinion.
My other friend and I are contacting our other friends to see whether they would like to be a part of this celebration. I am assuming we will not be gathering a lot of people, but that is okay. I somehow understand my friends as our mentor was not a pleasant person (they say people never forget how others make them feel), but I and some other friends also recognize her tremendous influence, support, and efforts on our developments. So we feel that this mentor deserves a great celebration and our acknowledgements.
I increasingly think that officially and sincerely acknowledging people’s good deeds, contributions, great works, and help is very important. It is a great pleasure to be writing/saying these nice words to the others and I am sure those who get acknowledgement are feeling great about it, too. I also think that it brings a highly positive notch to the relationships and overall make everyone feels really good; small stuff are forgotten and the big picture emerge. Great.
On the personal side; No person is perfect and some people are not pleasant. But, I would rather choose an unpleasant mentor who cares about me and contributes to my development, rather than a mentor who is an ineffective mentor but highly pleasant person. Of course, it would be great if our mentors were both pleasant and effective. But I know this does not happen all the time. And that is okay.
So, if you think you have people to recognize, thank, acknowledge for their help, support, kindness, goodness, contributions to your education/training/well being, professional success, or development as a person, take this holiday season to send/say them an acknowledgement note. Tell them what exactly you liked about them and how appreciative you are.
If you wish of course.
let’s heal and seal 🙂