the dream

I had a terrifying dream this morning.

I was in another city, another place, and another workplace (different building). My boss was the same and she told me that I was let go….. I could not understand this for a moment and after the initial shock, I felt so horrible. There were more junior people in my work place who did not perform as well as me. I had international recognition and often get invited to give talks. My team members were doing great too with their own and somehow unique and extraordinary activities and performances. So why was I let go? Because they preferred to keep people from this city?

It was so real, this dream. I felt insecure (I should have been a poor member of the organization otherwise I would not be asked to leave), angry (because it was not true that I was bad – I am not well known where I am but other places do know me), and mine and my team’s performances metrics are so good.

See, I woke up angry, confused, and feeling horrible, and after realizing it was a dream, I immediately felt grateful that it was just a dream..

This is so ironic in some ways, but then also such an eye opener. Reason? Only last week or so, I wrote a post about how I would not mind being let go if my workplace gives me a nice sum of severance package…

Man… No, I do not want to be fired. I do not wish to lose my job. I do not wish to be without my job. No matter how much I do not appreciate/like where I am.

As horrifying as it was, this dream was the one that cured my dull thoughts at least for now. Grateful.


10 thoughts on “the dream

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  1. I loved how you turned it around. instead of being angry and glum all day, you recognized it for what it was- a way to live something you thought you were ok with and realizing that you’re really not ok with it. Very insightful. thank you for sharing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I wish that was that easy; you know certain people would prefer to keep people with certain characteristics in their work place. preference regardless of performance can happen anywhere (even though it is wrong)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I think being let go would be a horrifying experience! I would feel so ashamed. It would be hard for me to tell people. I haven’t had to go through it yet, but I am still young and have many many working years left. It would be hard not to take it personally, even with a huge severance package.

    I think the only time I’d be okay with it if I was close to retirement and they wanted me to retire early because I was costing too much lol. At my mom’s last job, they let people go who were close to retirement, but paid 1 month’s salary for every year they’d worked there. The ladies that had gotten let go were close to 65 but had already worked there for 24 years, so they stayed at home on 2 years of full salary, then retired. I don’t think I’d be mortified in that situation!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. that is a perfect situation you mentioned! I had heard a similar one somewhere in Ontario. I am not that close to retirement and even with 1 month/year payment, it could not solve any problem to me. So especially after this dream I decided staying in this job as long as I can is my best interest 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. It sounds like your subconscious mind gave you a different perspective at which to see your current situation and made you realize that it’s not really all that bad. I think it’s interesting how our brains can do that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think you got that right!
      I had another dream this morning, which also explained a lot of things. I guess nowadays my subconscious mind is really working hard to make sense of things and show me the different perspectives I am ignoring.

      Liked by 1 person

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