I woke up early this morning, before 8 am (yes, it is early for me: I usually get up around 9 am). I was wondering how Jamie the cat was. After doing the morning routine (it is routine now, like changing his water and cleaning his litter box), I left him for the first time at home for the day.
The morning was awesome with a cool temperature but nevertheless sunny and walking felt good. I was planning to take the bus, but then feeling the goodness coming out of the day and walking, I decided to walk to office. I was there in 30 min. I found a chance to look at the trees and enjoy the quite morning with little traffic. I really enjoyed this morning walk.
Work went well and after two long meetings, I was back at home in the afternoon to continue to work here. I was wondering how the cat did, and to my joy everything was alright; he was well and nothing at home has been harmed, broken, moved, or trashed by the cat. That felt good and once more I realized what an easy cat he was.
I try to pet him and play with him time to time. I guess it is true what they say; when you ignore them, cats approach you. I must say surprisingly he is the one that wants to lie on my lap, climb on me, or head butt me. It is really interesting that I get so much love and comfort from this cat. I hope he will not change. I hope he will not get frustrated by constantly asking for love/attention from me and getting it maybe 60% of the time.
I feel conscious about this; I feel like I must address all of his needs and wants. I am good with providing him safety and food/water/clean litter (i.e. basic needs). I pet him the majority of the time he wants it, but not always. So far, I did not let him climb on my face or bite my socks. I lift him off my keyboard. I feel like rejecting the poor animal, which makes me quite sad/sorry. I know how it feels to be rejected…..
But I also think that I cannot do everything he wants me to, like play when he wants, scratch when he wants, climb on me, bite me, or let him sleep on my bed. One of my fears is to have a cat who is pretty spoiled…
It turns out we both have rules.
I have a trip to make in October for a week and I wonder how we are going to handle his care. I either need to find someone to house sit him or I will place him in a boarding facility. I do not know how I will and how he will feel about it.
Honestly while it is a great cat, I can tell you it is not all white and black for me. I feel like I cannot give him the attention he needs. When I am away on trips, it is a problem. Since I am used to live alone, I kind of scared of the sudden noises he makes, especially at night. The fact that he becomes more active at night is unfortunate; these are the times that I really need the quiet time for myself. Feeling conscious, having some kind of remorse, and all bunch of other feelings….
Maybe they were right; I should have fostered him first and then decide to adopt. It feels like the buyer’s remorse; when you buy the house it is exciting first and then it becomes kind of worrisome and you regret its responsibility big time. Until it becomes your routine….
I have not given up yet, but honestly I miss my freedom 🙂