joy journal – Jan 23, 2018


1. I am grateful for sleeping well and getting up with relatively mild thoughts in my mind. 

2. I am grateful for taking the bus this morning even though it was really cold and windy. Sometimes I love my persistence 🙂

3. I am grateful for having three meetings today all with some kind of progress. This feels good. I have a new team member who is visiting our organization for a couple of months. She is nice and intelligent. I hope to be able to make this an enjoyable and beneficial visit for both sides. We immediately identified a technical skill for her to develop, which is one of our strength. This feels awesome. We then have a small project to develop together, which again feels good. If we can work well and if we are lucky somehow, we can make this 🙂

4. I am grateful for working till 3.30pm at the office, which is pretty good for me. I took the cab and ate junk food in the evening, but hey, at least some small goals I have had for myself are done today: sleeping well, taking the bus in the morning (despite the cold), eating better (lots of carrots today), working mostly at the office (till 3.30 pm), not having anxiety was a huge plus, working (albeit at home till late) but nevertheless finishing some work. I now have a “me” time for another 1-2 hours before I go to sleep. That should be okay – at least for today.

5. I am grateful for not beating me up for taking the cab in the afternoon and eating junk food. I came to realize that in order for me to have a life just the way I want it, I must fix the work situation first. It is sad that the stress and time-commitments of the work takes priority over my own personal life. It is really sad…. I keep going in this difficult time; poor budgets, poor conditions, and poor recognition. I have not given up yet but I keep wonder when or if that would happen…..

I will know when it is over. It is not over yet.

6. I am grateful for working; I may be stressed. I may be anxious. I may be depressed (time to time). But I am functional and am giving my 100% to this toxic work-place. I have been working in this field for 24 years now. This is a long time; I studied, I worked, I moved up, and now I am no sure where my career is. Frustration is a common experience with everyone I guess. After all these years and dedication, do you not expect recognition? respect? Some kind of satisfaction and ease?

I do.

Maybe that is what exactly I should be grateful for.

7. I am grateful for being safe, healthy, warm, and sane today. It could have been much worse – I could have lost my mind :))))))

Joking.

But it is a possibility, you know 🙂

————————————–

Things that I appreciate myself for today:

  1. I appreciate myself for making an effort to feel good by taking small and simple steps
  2. I appreciate myself for bringing carrot to office – they make wonderful food, especially when I have no time to have lunch
  3. I appreciate myself for working…… At least things are moving
  4. I appreciate myself for being calmer and more confident re; finishing work and figuring out things
  5. I appreciate myself for knowing – knowing myself, my feelings, my abilities, my limitations, and my wishes

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 thoughts on “joy journal – Jan 23, 2018

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  1. One thing you could try doing is writing down what your perfect job would be like. Get as creative with it as you can….what would you do, what would it look like where you work, how would you feel about it, what would your hours be, how much would you earn, would you work with others or alone…Put a list together and review daily, you can always update it, remove items, add items…each day spend a little time with it…most of all have fun with it and let your imagination run wild!! I am going to be a famous songwriter and musician and make millions writing songs for others to record & sing… I may even take singing lessons so that I could sing my own songs and sell them too!! 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. sounds so good. I must do this exercise. i always felt that there were things that I could do other than what I do right now and I could be an entirely different person if I had stopped doing what I am doing. I would live in a warmer city, I would be more joyful and relax, and I would discover myself and life more. I would interact with people, nature, and animals in different ways. I would think, talk, dress, and walk differently….. I think this exercise is working!!!! :))))))

      Liked by 1 person

      1. See….write that all down in your journal…I have to tell you it’s sounds pretty wonderful to me!!! I always loved writing poems, and now my poems have been turned into songs, so now I’m writing them more like a song than a poem…I bought a piano in June, my whole life I wanted to learn how to play…I’ve written music to a song I wrote…I’ve taken a few lessons via YouTube but once the warm weather gets here and the nights are lighter I may take lessons from a local person…I one day play Beethoven and Back and all those concertos…I’ll even write my own that will become world renowned just like theirs…this is so fun isn’t it?! Ok you have an excellent start here…enjoy my friend!! 🙂 xo

        Liked by 1 person

        1. OMG – you are good 🙂 did you really buy the piano? well done! I think what I really realized that I do not wish that to be my life and this to be me. And yes the change has started and let’s see where my journey is going to bring me to 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Yes I really did…first I bought a guitar but it was a little too big for my body…and my first love had always been a piano…so I was able to return the guitar and I bought the piano. I am so happy that I did…it’s one of the best things I’ve done for myself…I love it so much…I look forward to being able to really play it well!! Your journey will bring you where you want it to…you set the course and it will follow…that’s the best part!! Good luck! xo 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

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