the quest for happiness

The more I write about happiness, the better I understand about it.

Yesterday I wrote about it here; comments and interactions by other bloggers were great, too. I understood somethings; about myself, about happiness, and about how other individuals see it.  Thank you everyone who commented.

I understood that the definition of happiness may be not one, but many.

I understood that if the power of being happy is in ourselves, then that means we are responsible for our own unhappiness. Boy… Does that mean I am silly, incapacitated, or weak (otherwise I would be happy?). Does that mean my “happiness genes” are mutated? I strongly react against this statement; I believe things out of our control can greatly influence our chances of happiness and how we feel. I would have never chosen to be unhappy. Why would anyone choose to be unhappy? Unhappiness is not a choice. Not mine. Not many people I know who were unhappy. You cannot stand tall, laugh, and glow when you have lost or never have had things, people, opportunities, loves, and all bunch of other things that affect you today. You can choose to move on with your life maybe. You can choose to forget maybe. You can pretend to be happy maybe. But sometimes our circumstances lack the conditions to be happy. No matter how some of us try hard to be happy. Can we really blame this person for not being happy?

I understood that I could be clinically depressed nowadays as I have everything I need; I have a great family, a great and meaningful job, finances and anything else I can need in the material world. I lack no material. But I lack happiness, the zest and excitement of life.

I understood that I find in me the right to be happy. I demand happiness. I demand my right to be happy. I am rebelling against the status quo re; unhappy state.

I understood that if that turns out to be because of a chemical imbalance in my brain, I will regret not going to a doctor before. Nobody deserves to be unhappy and miss their life because of a chemical imbalance.

I understood that I am not the only one with a quest and thirst for happiness.

I understood that my happiness and unhappiness might be different than others’ experiences. As I wrote as a response to a comment; “sometimes we must accept that we do not have all the answers and we cannot get everyone’s circumstances. In those cases, empathy has the softest voice and silence has the sweetest tune“. I may not understand your unhappiness and you may not get mine. Assuming that we understand and have all the answers you or I need is not right. Discussions are helpful, but sometimes empathy and silence are the best ways to respond to someone unhappy.

I may be depressed but not even once I thought about leaving life. That makes me excited 🙂 I hope I have a long and well life in front of me, in which I will keep exploring myself, life as a whole, and become happy.