Excitement

Excitement…

Excitement is an integral part of life, is it not?

I feel much better and energized when I am excited about something. Maybe it is my saving and budgeting efforts. Maybe getting stuff on sale with really good deals. Maybe it is baking a great bread and making plans for the next ones. Maybe it is walking in the mornings or finding a great book every once a while. Maybe it is accomplishing something at work, working efficiently, and getting good news/recognition. Maybe it is the nice weather and awakening of the nature with the coming of Spring. Maybe it is the coming vacation to be spent with my family. Maybe it is blogging and knowing that I am a part of a meaningful, informative, and supportive community.

Whatever it is, I increasingly realize that excitement is a good thing for me.

My budget has always excited me, occupied my mind with its ups and downs, and with its progressive and nowadays stable nature. To tell you the truth now that I am spending much less than before, and know and apply saving strategies that work for me, I am not as excited about it as before. OK….

Books still excite me, but I have got used to be on shopping ban for them and the fact that I have many books at home to be read, including the GRMM’s A Song of Ice and Fire, I am not really excited by the idea of buying books. The only book I can buy is about how to make bread – that is all. And I guess I will wait till my vacation to buy one or two.

Work has been exciting today as I could work efficiently and with less than regular distraction. I am moving a good project and that feels good. Also, my colleague from yesterday and I interacted quite positively today, which removes any stress about our potential conflict. All to be grateful for and yes I am excited about these.

I do not wish to walk in the mornings nowadays and I am okay with this. I know when I feel so, I will walk. I am not pressuring myself and I kind of take it as it happens. I am also excited about this lack of pressure and comfort I provide to myself.

Spring, of course, is amazing and I continue to be excited about it. I gave water this evening too to the seeds that I planted at the weekend. I also am happy to see my rosemary is looking considerably healthier that the weekend, thanks to watering it every morning. i am excited about this, too.

I am yet to feel excited about my vacation as I am more focused on finishing things at work prior to leaving. I usually start feeling excitement the day of my travel – I cannot wait for that. there is something awesome about leaving everything behind and taking a break to focus on what is important in my personal life for a change.

I am excited about trying breads, yet I develop that fear of running out of ideas or recipes to try. I know this is not a realistic fear as I am sure there are tons of recipes out there. But, I guess what this tells me is that I like to figure things out, try and experiment. Once I figure things out, then they are not that interesting anymore. So I constantly come up with new plans – like making my own pasta (which I will try some other time). I am also excited about the prospect of purchasing cookie sheets, dough scrapper, and a nice mixing bowl.

Luckily, I get to search for and identify the items on sale each week by checking three store in my close vicinity – that excitement is thus permanent.

I realized that anticipation seems to be a common theme in my bread-making, planted seeds, work, and budget adventures. An interesting driver of excitement.

I realized that once I got something integrated in my life, like my budget, I am not that excited any more.

I realized that some of my excitements are temporary, such as Spring and my rosemary.

I realized that maybe that is why I need to keep look for other activities/things/hobbies to keep myself excited.

Oh well..

Nonetheless, I would like to remind myself that I have time and resources such as internet – I can figure them out.

Who knows what they will be and how they will change my life. Now this idea is exciting!

🙂

new interest: gardening

I hope I will not lose interest in this newly found interest: gardening.

When I was young, I loved planting beans and see them grow so easily and fast. I just loved it. I have been hardly interested in planting flowers, though.

This summer I planned to have a vegetable garden in a part of my yard. I would like to plant garlic, lettuce, some beans, onion, and potato to start with. Nothing too much; I am not even sure this climate is suitable to grow them. I am experimenting.

When I bought my house, the yard was completely neglected. It is not a big yard; I have 7 small trees, two of them are lilacs. I love lilacs. I used to smell lilacs whenever I saw them prior to buying my house. Last summer when I saw that I had one white and one lilac colour lilacs, I was ecstatic! Other trees I have no idea. They are not in great shape, but I am not interested in throwing them away. Let’s wait a couple of more years and see how they are doing.

After I planted some daffodils, tulips, and some other flowers today, I felt really good. I need to clean my yard and get rid of a lot of debris from previous users. The shed at the end of the yard is disintegrating (it is not mine; belong to the house on the other side of the fence), which looks really uncool. I can plant some long plants to that area to conceal that view. My yard is also not even, which bothers me. I should be digging and fixing it this summer; I am assuming I can buy and plant grass later should I want it.

honestly, I have no interest in grass. I rather would like to have stone paths to cover the majority of my yard. It would help me stop mowing and the yard would look a little bit more civilized. I think I will prioritize the side of the yard for this; I can see myself having pots of flowers and maybe a bird fountain over there. Birds are amazing, too. Trees, birds, and flowers. Nature is amazing 🙂

My feeling is that nowadays is the best time to star digging the yard; the soil is still wet and soft due to recent rains and melting of the snow banks. This makes my job quite easy.

See, me, the person who keeps saying “I am lazy” has now found a new interest that requires time and effort, but still excites her 🙂

I just hope I will continue to have this interest.

a thought on the necessity of letting go

When is it the time to let go off something?

I have a number of projects going on by my unit. Some of them work really good and some others do not. That is not something new or unique to me.

Sometimes, for the sake of better, bigger, or more promising projects, old, stagnating, and problematic projects need to be ended. I have decided today that I did not need any more struggle for a project of mine – it moved with the effort of a staff, very well actually. But when it came to organize the results obtained by this project, we hit a hard road. It has been some number of months. Enough is enough – the headache and extra time and effort I put into it is not worth anything any more.

It is a pity that we will not further pursue this project; a lot of exciting things could have been done, but prolonged hardship and negativity erases the motivation and removes the priority, especially when there are more exciting stuff, like new projects.

I did not make this decision very easily or suddenly; I have been thinking about it for some time. Finally, today with no regret, I made the decision.

It was the right thing to do.

And it feels right.

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