crushing desktops and all

here I am again!! 🙂

I have been away for some time – almost two months.

I first went to a family visit, which was amazing. I did not use internet much at that time, which was amazing by the way (no more work-related stress while being with family and de-stressing).

Then my desktop died on me. Argh. The poor thing was only 3 years old, but just like that the entire thing just shut down. I went to a tech service. There was nothing to be done….. Okay. I said, I will order a new one. And I have and it is just installed and ready to use 🙂

I have missed blogging and being connected to all of you! I cannot wait to scroll down and read the posts. I must say the last few months have been interesting and having no computer at home was more interesting than ever, but I also need to say that I enjoyed it very much. I was able to watch TV and read books, and contemplate. It was peaceful and I think that is because I was forced to not work at home. I want to limit my computer use at home. We will see how that goes 🙂

Happy summer and August everyone! Hope everything is going well with you!

Four seasons

Fall is upon us. It is my favorite season.

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The season of energy and renewal (summer) has come to an end, leaving its place to this gorgeous season.

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Fall always remind me of “closure”; evaluating and finishing things, even they are only thoughts, and move on with a period of quietness and break, and then bury or leave those that do not serve you anymore during the hibernation season of winter.

Winter is a season of survival, though. It is often harsh where I am and our daily lives are somehow dictated by the weather; will there be snow today? Will I shovel? Will there be a snow day? Can I really go to that store to pick up something? Will my power be restored, if it is cut due to some reason? What if I want to walk but cannot make it because the sidewalks are full of snow banks, or even worse, ice? Am I warm enough?Winter thus makes me feel like I must rather focus on the physical world than my inner world. 

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Spring, on the other hand, is a kind of time of re-birth; the time of new ideas, new adventures, new plans, new hope…. There is something awesome about the awakening of the nature that inevitably makes me feel like now I can do what I have not done or could not do before.

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The cycling nature of “nature”, whether that is snow, plants, trees, or flowers that flourish, animals populating, or simply changing temperature and daylight, is thus a reflection of our lives.

Maybe our lives is a reflection of nature?

I do not know really.

But we all are connected.

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Sunday morning musings

It is a bright and warm summer day; who can complain about these? Certainly not me 🙂

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It is a routine Sunday morning, which is good. It feels great to be back to my routine after a couple of agitated days.

There are things that I realize after the recent ordeal:

a) I feel better within my own so called “highly structured daily life”, where every action and activity has a time and meaning. I do grocery shopping on Thursdays, purchase milk on Saturdays, clean the house and do the laundry on Saturdays, read, write, and watch movies/TV series during the evenings, and work during the weekdays between regular hours. I miss spontaneity time to time, but losing my routine when I most need it (i.e. when I am agitated and stressed) is worse than the boredom that I feel when not having spontaneous activities. You may call me old, hey, I may call myself old, but honestly I like the way my now middle-age mentality works for me, and knowing what works and what does not work for me. One can call this wisdom that comes with age….

b) I may need to reduce the amount of distractions I have at the office so that I can focus on what is important for my work. I lead a small team of talented individuals, some of which requires more supervision that the others. I also have collaborations with other groups and roles in committees in my organization. Late Spring, I started to aim for having at least 2 work day with no meeting, which turned out to be quite beneficial for me. I would love to keep doing this with some luck, by saying “no” more often, and by organizing my time a little bit better. I contemplate on increasing the work hours, either during the week or assigning a week night for work. Fridays can be a good option, but I will have to see that. While I am aware of the fact that I must work harder or longer, I also would love to keep my “me” time that relaxes me and lets me engage in learning, writing, and fun activities. I am a strong proponent of having “me” time. I do not wish to let go off this now.

c) The recent agitation was triggered by me being not prepared well in advance. When I realized that the work I was working on was, although bright, not feasible, I felt anger. Towards myself, towards everything and everyone that kept me away from having more time. This is not right and this is not healthy; others have nothing to do with this. It is my own responsibility to protect my own time and manage it better. I should take full responsibility for my own actions, or inactions, and stop being a drama queen. I cannot keep failing myself. This gotta stop.

d) These being said, I must also say that stress sometimes makes me work way productive than the rest of the time. Like the rest 3 days, when I actually fumed a lot but also did a lot. Stress is counter-productive when it is too much, but as the others would also say, it also facilitates some action. Thus, as long as I remind this myself during high stress times, perhaps I could go through those times smoother.

Lessons learnt… Sometimes over and over… But, hey I am a human being with all the fails and limitations. 

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I am looking forward to today; there will be a thrift store visit (I hope), conversations with my family, a sourdough to bake and give to my good neighbours next door, and some X-File episodes to watch at night! Boy, the later parts of the Season 2 was just heart-pumping and the first episode of Season 3 is making me jump in excitement! Thank goodness that we have such joys and excitements in life! 

I believe it is gonna be a fantastic day!

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Have a great Sunday everyone 🙂

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random thoughts

We have a summer alright… A nice warm summer with heat and clear, blue sky. Like I have never seen here kind of sky. What a blessing we have had this year! I am grateful 🙂

The week has ended and I feel like time is flying and that is why I am not feeling overly enthusiastic. I have had a look at the important things I must do in three months: three projects to be written and submitted; one report to be finalized and submitted; two business trips to Europe; a short vacation in Europe; a new team member to hire among many others. And I am thinking about taking some days off to work comfortably at home or at the office, while also relaxing somehow, cleaning and decluttering my home, and having some free time to contemplate. How are all these gonna happen? I am feeling stressed rather than joyful, and that is not right.

Thankfully it is true that if I am not distracted and have no meeting during the day, usually I do generate a great amount of work. Like today. This pleases me a lot and gives me hope. I can do all of these if I can be smart enough to keep the distraction by others to minimum. Yep.

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I have had a nice sleep yesterday and as a result in the morning I woke up feeling positive. I wanted to wear something different and eventually tried a white cotton shirt that I had bought years ago. I was surprised when I looked at the mirror that it actually looked pretty good on me and I was lucky to have it! Considering that I was contemplating about donating it soon, this is quite a surprise, do you not think? I wonder what other treasures I will find while going through my stuff during the decluttering activity and what items I will dump/get rid of? I really cannot wait to start this tomorrow 🙂

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My grey roots are showing and seeing them like 50 times a day annoys me big time. I am feeling like I am getting close to visiting a hair saloon and starting the process of grey hair.

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I am conflicted because I want to visit a number of people in a couple of months and I wonder how they will react to me transitioning to grey hair. Perhaps I should leave it to after that time? I really do not know. I think everybody would be okay with me being happy with my new hair.

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I am assuming I will be happy with it, by the way.. Is this a big assumption? Perhaps I should really let this annoyance of grey roots sink so that I can be happy when I no longer have that issue with even a larger patch of gray showing on my head… Who knows?

I was not sarcastic here… No, really.

Anyways…

Talk to you next time 🙂

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Summer heat

You know, being a Canadian is a unique experience;

“eh”,  “poutine”, “Canadian beer”, “Tims/timbits”, “Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP)”, “Canadian kindness”, “universal healthcare”, “sorry – not sorry”, “snow/winter” and many more 🙂 

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The most important one, however, is that you may be bothered with heat and sun.

That is right!  🙂

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Yesterday was 22 C and I walked to a shopping mall at noon. I believe I have had sun stroke and had to take a long cool shower to cool my body and reduce my heart rate. The same thing today – it was 27 C, sunny, and hot, and here I am trying to cool my body..

Boy, no hesitation here. 

I am Canadian and I am loving it.

 

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Tuesday already..

It is Tuesday already….The long weekends make the week quite short. A three day long weekend and a shorter week following it. What do you say? Double win! :))))

We have a great day today, which is supposed to chill down tomorrow. My windows are open. There is something nice about walking through the front of the windows and feeling the cool fresh air on your skin. All these things that I am grateful for during Summer 🙂 Add this list the ice cream and imagine how happy I can be 🙂

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I have some serious work to do within the next 3 months. This means I gotta organize myself well and use my time like a tiger. I must focus on this…. Doing what matters most. It is a challenge for me to do select things rather than everything in my list, but we all will see how this will go. Who knows? maybe I will do this 🙂

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In our interactions with a unit in my organization, we have been having some mis-communications and rejections only because of mis-understanding and lack of standards/clarity. I volunteered to work in that unit/committee with the hope of improving things and also my own understanding. I fear that they will not approve it, but if they do, then this will be awesome. You know I applied for a job last week with mixed feelings, and I wanted to note what I really like about my current job: this freedom to decide myself to undertake new things, and ability to learn new stuff is what make this job really unique and beneficial for my own development. Totally awesome! There is not any other job that can provide me with such a  great mental stimulation. It will be hard to leave this job.

Good to know! 🙂

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random thoughts

It is a true summer day; bright, blue, and warm 🙂

I have had a good work at the office but left early in the afternoon as I was trying to find a solution to an idea. I must apply for new projects to get interest in them and then lead them to completion. I am traditionally good about this, but the two ideas that I was brewing lately seem to be done by others, which necessitates me to find new ideas.

Finding new ideas is not the problem, but finding an idea that others will find interesting is. I realize that this is bothering me more than before and I feel at that point again where I just want to quit this line of work and do something that is more interesting, challenging, and awarding. Where I can feel great about my performance, abilities, and work. Enough is enough, is that not?

I am making an application this week. If it comes through I will be interested in making the interview and learning about myself (Will I really want this job? Will I really be willing to leave my job and life here?) and this job. I believe I can do it really well, but the question is whether or not there will be others who can make it better than me, or whether or not the human resources personnel or whoever is going to screen the applications will find me good enough for this position. All these possibilities make me feel fuzzy, but I will go ahead and make this application anyhow because I want to. Also because I can.

🙂

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My appetite is quite big nowadays, especially today. All I want to do is to eat, especially ice cream. I also want to eat pasta but goodness, if I eat it I sure will gain a pound or two (mostly water retention of course, but…). I think I crave for carbs to feel good…

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One of my aims for the summer was to reduce the consumption of canned food, especially those that I munched on in the office. I have done good so far and reduced my purchase and consumption of canned fish, yet now I feel hungry at the office, and need to bring food from home everyday. I purchased a plastic container (BPA-free) yesterday to put food in and carry it in my purse (it is large enough), and today I have had some veggies and tofu as the lunch. It was great but not enough to curb my appetite. Tomorrow I am bringing in some veggies and canned bean, and I am laughing at myself knowing what an ironic thing that is to be consuming canned food again..

I have serious concerns about this – will I really be able to eat well at the office?

I guess what I need is to plan a little bit better. Obviously the status quo is not optimum and I must refine and revise it. The objective of reducing the exposure to canned food is a good one. Finding alternatives to canned food, on the other hand, is a challenge. What can I bring in? I think cheese and hard boiled eggs as well as meatballs are great options; hard boiled eggs are awesome, I love them, but then I cannot keep eating them everyday. I have concerns re; cheese and if I can make my own cheese then I can have it, but the chances are slim to have this everyday. Meatballs are versatile alternatives and all I have to do is to prepare and cook them at the weekends (see how lazy i can get?). Also, sandwiches. If I must eat bean, the better option is to cook them myself from dry beans. I think this is what I can focus on this weekend.

And I think I should increase my purchase of veggies so that I can supplement the protein source with them.

Sigh…. So much to figure out. All in order to eat better and healthier! 🙂

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Sunday morning musings

This Sunday morning too I am plain lazy on purpose and focused on lovely activities.

For example, my usual and long (3-4 cups long) rendezvous with coffee is going well and very enjoyable.

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I have already walked around my small yard with my coffee mug in my hand to see how the seeds and flowers were coming out after the long rain yesterday (and they are all good).

I have had a light breakfast with the beet sourdough loaf I had baked last week and strained yogurt, which makes me feel quite light (not bloated).

Weather is great outside, warm and inviting and there is sunlight everywhere which opens my spirit and joy box.

And I am listening to some songs that I have not for years, which makes me nostalgic and wanting to do more of enjoyable things today and the days to come.

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I have little plans shaped for today. I think I will talk to my family first thing first and then go out for a walk and to buy some sewing stuff. I am really excited about this opportunity – hopefully what I need are all available in the stores that are open today (not too many choices, but we will see). As usual, I will bake my weekly sourdough loaf (with kefir – the first ever trial of mine – we all will see how that will turn out tonite). I will also cook a nice dish with minced beef and eggplant. It is great that summer is here and reminded me about this dish. I am guilty of not cooking great recipes that take time and require care, but yield the best taste ever. This one I am really looking forward to.

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Now let’s go find something to do that comes spontaneously and makes me feel like on top of the world! 🙂

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random thoughts

This week has been going non-stop at work and I am very pleased with this.

In the last few months the work has been going well – albeit slow sometime. I am feeling like I have geared it up a bit, things are moving faster (although not as fast as I would hope), and I am feeling satisfied and happy as a result of these 🙂

This week we are having a summer time. I tell ya – it is warm during the day, even too hot at nights for our Canadian bodies (like, 23C hot?!!), I am wearing no winter coat or trench coat, and everywhere is green and flowery. Beautiful!

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I feel like I am missing a huge opportunity every minute I spend inside the office. After all, we are at around the end of June and my goodness we have only 5-6 weeks of summer. I am so conflicted – should I keep working during the summer or take 1-2 weeks off to enjoy it without work? Argh… I really want to do both. Perhaps the best solution is to make sure I walk out during the noon and work during the rest of the day. Since I get up and go to office early, walking during the noon should not affect my work.

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I think some of the seeds I planted in the yard are coming to life! This is so exciting for me – I hope they are not weed but real flowers and plants! I got lazy and did not water them this evening upon returning from office. But later I realized how unfair that was to my little seeds and threw myself and my pitcher out to yard. It felt good to do this for these lovely life forms 🙂

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Overall, I am excited about summer, the seeds that seem to be germinating in the yard, and my work performance. I will meet with an ex-team member of mine tomorrow afternoon and I plan to play with her 1-year old son and totally enjoy my time 🙂

Life is good, my friends.

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Sunday morning musings

Happy Sunday everyone 🙂 Wherever you are, I hope you are having a great day, joy, hope, safety, and anything else your heart may desire.

Happy father`s day too! Those fathers who have been great to their kids and families – you should be proud of yourself. Hope you are having a great day too.

I am having a rather quiet Sunday.

When compared to yesterday this is an excellent change I must say. So how was my Saturday? First of all, I prepared my first sourdough with beet and we shall see how that will develop this afternoon when I bake it (proving now). I also did quite a bit of shopping yesterday: as usual I went to a store 10 min away to purchase milk. And then to another one 25 min away (on foot) to purchase yogurt that was on sale; I consume them quite frequently so I was happy to get them yesterday. Also, weather was so nice (around 20C, which is Summer! for us here) that walking and being outside felt like I was on vacation somewhere exotic or something 🙂

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Then, as if all these walking was not enough, I decided to walk (~1 hour each way) to a shopping mall, having a hair cut along the way and checking two thrift stores for pitchers. Well, at the end I did not find anything I really needed, so I also checked a department store. I found a pitcher but honestly it did not give me any joy, so I decided to leave it there (even thought it was affordable and do the job). I am glad I have done this because I checked another nearby store and guess what? I found the loveliest pitcher just like I wanted: affordable (and on sale), large enough to take all the kefir I produce (around 3 liters – I plan to collect a couple of days’ produce and store in the fridge), with a large neck/lid (so that cleaning inside is easy – kefir usually leaves it fat marks on glass quite easily), and the lid is adjustable so that you can tighten it up or loose as you wish (which is critical while dealing with kefir, because grains produce gas which needs to escape the container otherwise it can explode)! How happy I was with that purchase? Very 🙂 That is a great feeling.

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When I reached back home it was already past 7 pm and my legs were just aching. I think I walked around 3 hours yesterday. I know I could stretch and relieve some of the muscle tension in my legs yesterday but I was too lazy to do this and rather I slept over it and now I am feeling much better. 

So, what are my plans for today? I am taking it light today. I have an interesting sourdough loaf to bake, family to talk to, some laundry to do, and some work to seriously think about. I can also work on the yard and clean the weed up.

And, I can always enjoy my coffee and reading 🙂

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Have a great Sunday friends 🙂

 

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random thoughts

Yesterday and today was warm. Like, really warm. Like the coat is too much, a thin jacket is enough kind of warm 🙂

Today is the last day of May and hopefully that means we are ready to have some kind of warm weather. Maybe Spring or something 🙂 I may sound exaggerating but you know, it is really cool here. June is usually rainy but at least we can be almost sure that it is not gonna snow again for some time. July and August will be hot, like 25 C hot 🙂 Our summer! Cannot wait 🙂

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I have had a good day at the office, only that I was more useful for others than doing my own work. Also, I have had an annoying encounter with a negative person, but I will let this go. I cannot let her ruin my morale (which is going strong nowadays).

I crave for kefir, but I need to wait till tomorrow to drink it. I checked it this afternoon – there is no thickening yet (I changed the milk yesterday), so gotta wait till tomorrow to have it. I really hope that the grains can pick up and yield kefir everyday, now that the weather is warmer. 

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We have a celebration event to attend tomorrow for a past associate of mine. It is such a heart-warming experience 🙂 I feel lucky and honored to be invited to this event. It is gonna be a beautiful day tomorrow – cannot wait!

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This week I have been feeling better in terms of my work, re; finding a new one. I have a better idea now; I think some people at my work place are bothering me and if they had left, perhaps things would feel better. 

One of these people is the person I mentioned above who is vastly negative, likes to complain about everyone except herself, and overly-likes to show herself, her abilities, and performance up. I find this kind of people the most annoying. I have sensitivity towards negativity so I often pick their energies, which is not good for me. I also cannot help but react a little bit, especially when they brag about everything and never about their own faults/mistakes/limitations etc., which usually damages my relationships with them. Well, I am not interested in having or keeping personal relationships with this kind of people, but when it is for work, we gotta keep being in each others’ lives and as such when such eye-rolling encounters occur, they realize that I am not pleased with them, which in turn give them a reason to take on me…. Argh….

Be annoyed and then show being annoyed and then get a negative consequence. Who is winning here really? Obviously, not me 🙂 That is my main reason for hoping that they will leave. As a matter of fact, she said today that she may leave because she deserves so much better than this organization (!). Goodness, I hope so.

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There. I ranted and feel a lot better already – thanks for listening! 🙂

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work and summer

Life continues, and time flies; this is how it feels this week.

I cannot believe that it is Wednesday! I feel like I have so much to do and not done much. Three office days passed already…

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On Monday afternoon I was at a professional event where one of the speakers said something like that “you gotta make sure you work for yourself, but not for others by doing their work“.

How true… I am so involved in other peoples’/trainees’ work that when I need to take care of my own work, I feel stressed because I either run out of time or the energy. I want to claim my own time at the office. Even though I like having trainees under my supervision, I must admit they are too much of a work sometime. It is interesting that not only my colleagues, but also my trainees feel the need to ask me even the smallest thing that they are capable of figuring out themselves. I do not know why I have this effect on everyone, but this gotta change.

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I kind of started doing  that recently; I aim for having at least 2 days/week without any meetings or commitment to others. I found that when I have such schedules, I am most relax, unstressed, and productive. I like my freedom in those days and the peaceful mindset. I love those “free” days 🙂 They make me happier.

Summer is almost here and I have great plans in terms of work. I have a couple of reports to be finished, new collaborative work to be done, at least one project application to make, while also relaxing during the warm, sunny days. This year is unique in the sense that I am not going to visit my family during the summer. That means I have time for myself. I would love to take 2 weeks off during summer. I am not sure when I would like that and what to do during that time, but I am hoping I will at least make it a priority to enjoy the warm outdoors, whether this means hiking, working in the yard, or sitting at a park. 

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nights

You know I love the night, way more than the day.

There is something so healing, so peaceful about silence, darkness, and lack of chatters and other people-related distractions (like phone, email etc). Nights are totally “my time”.

In the last one month or so, I started to have the habit of taking my laptop up to my bed and reading and relaxing there. This is quite unusual for me, but it was mostly motivated by the back problem I have had; sitting or lying in bed is easier on my back than sitting on the couch or the chair. At first I was not sure how I would feel about this, but now I am enjoying it very much.

I am often up till 12 pm or so, and even later at the weekends. I do not know whether it is the positive effects of my iron and vitamin D supplementation, but I am feeling less need to sleep (around 7.5 hours rather than 9 hours) and can easily wake up at around 7.30 – 8 am. I do not get up at that time, though. One of my long-time habit is to go back to sleep. I am usually up around 9 am. Then I go to the office. Usually takes me less than 30 min to get dressed, take the bus, and arrive there. I know I am lucky that my job has a flexible schedule and nobody says anything about me not being in the office before 9 am or after 4 pm. I am lucky (I told you I had a great job – it will be so difficult to leave this work).

Anyways, why did I start writing about nights now? I think because I was thinking the daylight savings ending (or starting?) this weekend. Does that mean we will have an extra hour of sleep or not? That I do not know, but I know that we will have more sunlight.

Yay for sunlight! Now, I love the nights but this does not mean I do not love to see the sun. I do. It gives me more energy and positive mood. Overall, sunlight is good for me, good for many people. I am so looking forward to it.

It also signals me that spring is about to come. Well, where I am we can expect snow till May but that is okay. I guess once March is over, the worst part of the winter will be over, too. When there is hope, there is excitement.

They expect a warmer than regular Spring this year. That would be really awesome. Four years ago or so we had a warmer summer here where people would get tans and overall looked happier than other summers. That was one great summer. Hope we can get a warmer than average spring and summer this year.

Hope we can all enjoy them.

Hope I can enjoy them.

random thoughts

Working from home in the last two days was very refreshing and effective – a big document is now almost finalized, which always gives contentment and happiness 🙂

All of a sudden today, the temperature got low. I do not know how low but even the jacket was not enough to keep warm. I will have to wear thicker clothes from today on. I think the summer is officially ended…

There are nice things about fall, though. The cooler temperatures makes me wear thicker clothes, which somehow makes me feel like I am pampering myself. This feeling originally was born when I purchased a dark brown short coat with a feathery-collar. The warmth around my neck was always something I had appreciated. While this coat is long gone, I imitate the feeling with scarfs in fall; it does help feel the same way (i.e. pampered). Also, I love it when the trees change colors; what a nice scenery the fall brings to us..

My efforts to declutter my living room, however slow, continues. I so far checked 30% of the books and sorted out those that will be donated. That translated into 2 large bags of books to be donated. I suspect maybe 3 or 4 more bags to come till I am finished. I feel like I can donate more books, but it is so hard to let them go especially if I have not read them lately. I gotta change my mindset about the books at home; I should see them as a library where there are many treasures to be read. That sure will help me to read them this time. And if next year I find out that I have not read them, then I should donate them, too.

I am thinking about purchasing a domain for this blog; but I am hesitant. When I decease, this blog should not decease with me (i.e. if I stop paying for the domain, they say they inactivate or remove the blog). Any of you have ideas? Cons and pros of switching to a domain? Please leave comments – Thank you.

random thoughts

A beautiful summer day – I hope everyone is having a similar weather.

I have done something out of my routine and went to visit a nearby museum. Admission was free today and it gave me a chance to see its contents and the view from the museum. It is famous with its view as it is on a hill and in the front is the green (nature), blue (ocean), and the colorful buildings all meshed up with each other. I congratulate myself for making this trip and enjoying not only the exhibitions but also the view 🙂

I am cooking at home today: yesterday I was so tired after the yard work that I bought myself a dinner in the evening. While the diner was not bad, the meal I tried yesterday was okay (do not get me wrong; I am thankful for the meal), but not overly tasty. I said to myself “you can cook better than that”, which was interesting because a) I do not like cooking that much, and b) eating out seems less appealing right now, which helps with my recent budgeting and saving efforts. So while I could not enjoy the meal I bought yesterday, I am grateful that it helped me to make better choices about myself.

I cut out a few lilacs from the trees today; I am not into hurting nature but I would like to dry these elegant flowers, and then frame and hang at home. I have seen somewhere yesterday some art-work including dried plants hung in the bathrooms; what a great idea! I will not only enjoy framing & displaying them, but I also hope to bring them with me wherever I will be in future, in case I sell my house.

One of the things that make me attached to my home is the yard and the trees in it. If you have a yard or a pot of plant/flower, or close to a park and other places of nature, I hope you are enjoying it right now 🙂

random thoughts

A rainy and grey day 🙂

Where I am, the weather is so not summer; the heater is on, the trench coat is back, and the umbrella is becoming one of my best friends.

It is good that I am going away for a vacation in 10-15 days in a sunny place. Family time! It is very exciting and I cannot wait. I will not be able to post to my blog and will certainly miss reading yours. But when I come back, at least these will give me something exciting to do and ease my transition back to my live and work here. You will be here, right?

I have now lost 10 pounds since I started conscious eating plan two months ago. I am still cautious that it may not be permanent; especially now that I am going to spend around a month with my family, I am almost sure that I will gain it all back 😦 That is sad, as I really need to lose another 10 more pounds for my health. Maybe, I will be able to control my eating while on vacation; let’s not be desperate; perhaps I can do that… My motivation is high, yet my confidence is not (how can I say no to my mom’s meals?). Sigh… 🙂 Maybe I will keep motivating myself by looking at the mirror; the weight loss is visible, especially around the belly region… Exciting!

I also would like to keep my conscious spending and budgeting practices while on vacation. I am almost sure that I will be able to do this one; unless something extraordinary happens. My family knows about my financial hardship and are highly supportive of my spending plan.

I took the cab this morning for no reason and I certainly did not feel good about it… I hope it will not rain like crazy tomorrow so that I can take the bus, not the cab. More or less,  I am still within my weekly budget and am hoping this week will be a satisfactory one, too. I will see on Thursday how I am doing 🙂

cheers everyone 🙂

random thoughts

A beautiful day. Not necessarily all warm and shiny, but it is good.

Work went well; one of my assistants found a mistake and I thought it was the mistake of another assistant of mine. And then my first assistant noticed that it was not his – the mistake is totally mine. I let my second assistant know immediately. It feels good to acknowledge my own mistake and establish my trust to my second assistant’s work. Lessons learnt for me? Yep, do not jump to conclusions immediately and make a more through research prior to giving a negative feedback to others for their work.

Walking back from the office was nice; so was the tea I drank in the office. My office view is getting better, now that all trees across from my office are turning green. There are many different shades of green – dark, mellow, light. And different sizes of the trees as well. How nice to be able to notice all of these 🙂

I have 320 followers today; which I never thought would happen. Thank you for following me. I hope my posts mean something to you. I also noticed for the first time that my posts now have ads…. I contemplated about buying the domain and taking control of the ads, but they say if I do not continuously pay for the domain, I may lose whatever posts I have in it. I do not want to lose any of these. I will think a little bit more sometime and see what is best.

enjoy your evening everybody 🙂

random thoughts

A beautiful summer day – bright and warm; a little bit humid but that is okay, too. Our skin benefits from the moisture 🙂

It is interesting that the 1st floor of the house is cooler than the 2nd; once someone had told me that the warm air moves up (which makes sense) making the 2nd floors warmer. That is excellent during winter, but in summer cooler bedrooms would be appreciated.

It was a regular work day – we have worked slowly but effectively. No stress 🙂 And the results we are getting are exciting. Looking forward to the end of these projects.

I have a new computer, which got stuck at the log in page. For some reason I could not make it show me the login page. Turning off the computer did not solve the problem, either. I called the company and they recommended me to contact a local tech person. Pissed and frustrated, I came up with the idea of removing the battery; I thought that would bring the computer back to initial start page. And that what has happened! I love my impatience (!).

I am really looking forward to this weekend – I hope it is going to be a warm and lovely one.

The seeds in my yard seem to have germinated. Now I am waiting for them to grow a little bit to make sure they are what I hope they are.

I am off to reading books this evening, though this does not mean I am not going to spare time to read your blogs.

Cheers everyone 🙂

joy journal – June 11, 2105

1. I am grateful for feeling better today.

2. I am grateful for the summer weather – for two days straight we have had incredibly warm (not hot) weather with blue sky. Its positive effect on me is incredible.

3. I am grateful for taking the bus this morning. I needed to wait 10 min at home, which I have. I must admit though the first thought passed my mind was “I can take the cab this morning”. It somehow went away after I managed to keep myself busy for 4 minutes at home.  When I got off the bus, I thanked for the opportunity to walk even for a short distance to my building.

4. I am grateful for eating two apples today. Healthy and tasty.

5. I am grateful for meeting with someone in our organization who provided me with excellent assistance on some project-related questions.

6. I am grateful for walking to and from the meeting (total around 25 minutes).

7. I am grateful for attending a seminar by a wonderful speaker; I enjoyed meeting with her, listening to her informative and energetic presentation.

8. I am grateful for walking to the appointment with the lawyer this afternoon. His office is 5 minutes away from my house and I could easily find it. I did mental-wrestling about taking the cab or walking. Eventually walking won 🙂

9. I am grateful for working at home after my appointment – I worked on an important document, which went really well in a short time. I am pleased.

10. I am grateful for meeting with my friends and having a dinner at a nearby restaurant. We were 5 people, all nice and cheerful people. The meal was great and so was the coffee 🙂

11. I am grateful for not over-eating today.

12. I am grateful for my conscious spending plans – lately they started to make a visible difference in my finances. I am highly motivated to keep going and save a lot more.

13. I am grateful for having a relaxing night – it is peaceful.

14. I am grateful for my plans to work tomorrow and possibly Saturday.

15. I am grateful for the coming weekend. I would like to read books, many of them if I can 🙂

16. I am grateful for keeping up with the challenges I assigned to myself: today I walked in the morning and then in the afternoon; took the bus not the cab; ate relatively healthy; did not make a purchase; enjoyed the view from my office; smiled more and had great time with friends; combed my hair in the morning, and determined to lift my mood, finances, and healthy life-style up.

17. I am grateful for being grateful.

joy journal – June 10, 2015

1. I am grateful for the warm day – today was the first day this year when only one jacket was enough (not two). It certainly felt like summer (finally)! Yay!

2. I am grateful for dumping the garbage for collection this morning – each time I am fascinated by the fact that so far I have not forgotten to do this 🙂

3. I am grateful for the left-overs from yesterday, which made a tasty dinner this evening.

4. I am grateful for my new computer! Yes, I am. It is fast, shiny, and does not get hot or crash every hour, as the previous one did 🙂 I am very happy with it.

5. I am grateful for the internet music sites I have learnt from one of my team-members today. I used to listen to youtube, but there seems to be other amazing sites. I find these sites refreshing and very useful. songza.com is one of these sites in case you are interested in. I am also amazed by the fact that I never thought about looking for sites other than youtube – was I limiting myself? Why did I not explore? The lesson I am getting out of this is there are numerous opportunities out there should I decide to look for. This concept can be translated to other aspects of my life. Wow! Love this 🙂

6. I am grateful for one of my team-member who enthusiastically work and generate very exciting data. Once needs to recognize and acknowledge the excellent team-players. They do not come very often, but if you see one, please try to keep them. One good team-member can do 10x better than 10 lousy team-members.

7. I am grateful for the classical music I am listening right now – incredibly energetic and harmonic. Made me feel good and at the same time very excited. Cannot wait to explore all genres 🙂

8. I am grateful for the relaxing night; it is peaceful and free.

9. I am grateful for everything I possess; the food in my kitchen, refrigerator, and pantry; the clothes and shoes, the furniture and everything else. I am abundant, safe, and sound thanks to them. I am grateful for myself and my job for making these possible.

10. I am grateful for learning to say no. I am getting better at it.

11. I am grateful for all the books I have. Some of them I had forgotten that I have had. Thanks to my shopping freeze, now I can find all bunch of interesting books to read right at home; very exciting!

12. I am grateful for working well and taking care of stuff. I have progressed quite a bit with the report I am working on. I have checked the majority of the data and so far we are good. I still have some stuff to do, but I have a great momentum and that will help me to move it way forward.

13. I am grateful for my new categorized budget and my awareness and enthusiasm to keep my expenses low.

14. I am grateful for keeping up with the challenges I have assigned myself a while ago: I cannot say I am routinely doing all of these, but they are in my list and whenever I can do any of them, I am happy to note. Today I took the busy (yay!); felt the happiness of taking the bus and congratulated myself at the office (yay!); walked in the evening; made no purchase (extra yay!); enjoyed the view out of my office window; drank chamomile tea; listening to the music (both at the office and now at home); expressed my appreciation and faith in my house and myself (that is something new; I find that it lifts my negative mood a little bit about my house and the repairs it needs).

random thoughts

I cannot believe it is Wednesday- the week is almost over.

In the morning, I needed to unexpectedly work on something with one of my team members, which somehow threw my daily schedule off. I felt distracted and inefficient. Thus I am not feeling satisfied about my work performance today. I did some work in the rest of the day though, just not the important ones that require my full attention. That is what happens when my day is fragmented between meetings, phone calls, urgent matters, and all. I need to protect my time to handle things.

I have learnt my lesson – I better keep the morning hours to myself so that I can do things and feel good about it. Awesome!

Since the days are long now, I stay up late in the office, maybe until 6pm. That is great so that I can catch up with work. In my unit, the summer work hours for staff is 30 min less/day than in winter. When comes to us, it seems to be opposite. This is of course a voluntary act on our side. I would rather work long hours in spring/summer than short hours in winter. When the darkness set, it is time to go home. That is my motto 🙂

I still have two more weekdays and if I wish, I know I can work at the weekend. I am hopeful that I will finish the things at my hand.

So no worries.

All will be fine.

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